Instant Messaging Goes Bleach
by SuperYuuki
Summary: Have you ever wondered what goes on when all our fav Bleach characters start IMing each other? Absolutely hilarious crap, that's what!  Slight hints at many pairings.
1. Eyeshadow, Emos, and Uncreativity

**A/N: Welcome to SuperYuuki's world of super random awesomeness! !**

** Seriously, I have no idea what I am about to type.**

** You are looking at pure spontaneous-ness.**

** I have seen stuff like this before, but I wish there was more of it. This is in IM format and any character I deem fit is going to join the chat room.**

** Disclaimer: I don't own Bleach.**

**. . . . . . . . . . ..**

_(Peaches has logged on)_

_(3Chappy3 has logged on)_

_(ShinyPurpleBubbles has logged on)_

3Chappy3: Who is ShinyPurpleBubbles?

ShinyPurpleBubbles: Who's Peaches?

_(FrozenFlowers has logged on)_

FrozenFlowers: MATSUMOTO! Paperwork, STAT.

ShinyPurpleBubbles: Oh no.

_(ShinyPurpleBubbles has logged off)_

Peaches: Hi Shiro-kun.

FrozenFlowers: Hi Momo. Hello Kuchiki-san. Momo, I think I hear someone calling for you.

Peaches: . . . It wouldn't happen to be Yumichika-san, would it?

_(MoreBeautifulThanU has logged on)_

MoreBeautifulThanU: AhHa! I thought you'd be here! WHERE DID YOU PUT MY EYESHADOW!

FrozenFlowers: I'm sure you are mistaken. Hinamori wouldn't never steal your eyeshadow, would you Momo?

3Chappy3: . . .

_(PwningU has logged on)_

_(FaceHighFive has logged on)_

PwningU: Yumichika, what the hell are you doing?

FaceHighFive: Rukia! I must know, WHAT ARE YOU THINKING RIGHT NOW?

3Chappy3: If you certainly must know, Renji, I've had Hatsune Miku's "Triple Baka" stuck in my head for three weeks now, therefore, I have been unable to think of anything besides Japanese leeks. **[A/N I know how you feel . . . ] **

_(3Chappy3 has logged off)_

FaceHighFive: Wait for me! It's okay, I'll get Caramelldansen stuck in your head, instead!

_(FaceHighFive has logged off)_

MoreBeautifulThanU: I am conducting a search for my missing eyeshadow, and I am positive that Hinamori is the culprit!

FrozenFlowers: And on what basis do you place these accusations?

MoreBeautifulThanU: I SAW her! With MY eyeshadow!

PwningU: You still use that?

Peaches: …

FrozenFlowers: Yumichika-san, You do realize that Hinamori is female, and it is common for females to wear make-up, therefore it is quite likely that Hinamori owns a shade similar to yours?

MoreBeautifulThanU: No, I'm sure that it was my eyeshadow she had.

Peaches: I – It was a gift from Aizen-taichou . . .

_(FrozenFlowers has logged off)_

PwningU: . . .

Peaches: . . . ?

PwningU: I hear screaming.

Peaches: I hear it, too.

MoreBeautifulThanU: Hinamori, quick tell him to 4s;oiru3209r8ufa9jq32040 9fhqv98eruh0fv[naw4u9gh830vqneuw[493htgvn[9q34hv 3q4h' GIV I8GWRYG

Peaches: Shiro-kun, don't kill him!

_(Peaches has logged off)_

_(PwningU has logged off)_

_(MoreBeautifulThanU has logged off)_

_(EternalTag has logged on)_

_(BlackSword has logged on)_

_(ShinyPinkBubbles has logged on)_

_(ShinyPurpleBubbles has logged on)_

ShinyPinkBubbles: Hi-ya, Rangiku-san!

ShinyPurpleBubbles: Orihime! How's it going?

BlackSword: According to my dad, she's clinically depressed, but she insists that she's fine.

EternalTag: Oh, Ori-thi-may is sad . . . It-syu-go, you should help her.

ShinyPinkBubbles: I'M FINE! Seriously, Ichigo, I have no idea why you worry this mu –

ShinyPurpleBubbles: What is it?

BlackSword: Inoue?

ShinyPinkBubbles: It's okay. I just had this odd feeling that someone was standing behind me.

_(NotEmo has logged on)_

NotEmo: Woman.

ShinyPinkBubbles: ULQUIORRA-KUN!

ShinyPurpleBubbles: Ow. I heard that, and I'm in a different dimension.

BlackSword: DAMMIT! I THOUGHT I KILLED YOU, BASTARD!

ShinyPinkBubbles: Ichigo! Stop being mean to Ulqui-kun!

ShinyPurpleBubbles: I think we know what was causing her depression. .

BlackSword: Yeah, but now I have to worry about that THING!

NotEmo: I have gotten quite stronger, trash, don't make me have to track you down.

ShinyPinkBubbles: EEEEEEEEEEEEEK! Stop calling people trash, Ulqui-kun! And Ichigo, STOP BEING MEAN TO ULQUI-KUN!

EternalTag: Ulquiorra-sama! N – Nel thinked you were dead.

_Private Message to ShinyPinkBubbles from NotEmo: _ Go to private chat room 2. The password is BadGuysRule.

_Private Message to NotEmo from ShinyPinkBubbles: _Okie-dokie.

_(ShinyPinkBubbles has switched to private chat room 2)_

_(NotEmo has switched to private chat room 2)_

BlackSword: WTF?

ShinyPurpleBubbles: I trust Orihime entirely, but this . . .

BlackSword: I CAN'T GET IN THE OTHER CHAT ROOM!

EternalTag: It-syu-go, your username isn't very creative.

ShinyPurpleBubbles: She is right.

BlackSword: I REALLY DON'T CARE RIGHT NOW.

EternalTag: Nel knows the password.

BlackSword: TELL ME!

EternalTag: Nel thinks it's 'AizenIsEpic'

ShinyPurpleBubbles: That's a horrible password.

EternalTag: But-but Nel thinked of it . . .

ShinyPurpleBubbles: Oh. Then it's a GREAT password!

EternalTag: Ooo, Nel is a-wondering, why is your username just like Ori-thi-may's?

ShinyPurpleBubbles: I copied hers because I was too lazy to think up my own.

EternalTag: Oh. That not interesting.

ShinyPurpleBubbles: . . .

_(ShinyPurpleBubbles has logged off)_

_(RidiculouslyTall has logged on)_

EternalTag: Nel knows that username!

RidiculouslyTall: Neliel? SHI*!

EternalTag: Language, Nnoitra.

BlackSword: DAMMIT NEL THE PASSWORD YOU GAVE ME WAS WRONG!

EternalTag: Oh. Then they must have changeded it, It-syu-go.

RidiculouslyTall: The hell we changed it. The last one was LAME.

EternalTag: But Nel thinked of that one!

_(NotEmo has switched to public chat room 1)_

_(ShinyPinkBubbles has switched to public chat room 1)_

NotEmo: The woman and I are done with our chat.

ShinyPinkBubbles: I love you, too, Ulqui-kun!

BlackSword: . . .

EternalTag: . . .

RidiculouslyTall: . . .

_(RidiculouslyTall has logged off)_

_(BlackSword has logged off)_

_(EternalTag has logged off)_

ShinyPinkBubbles: I think we startled them, Ulqui-kun.

NotEmo: It was your fault, woman.

_(NotEmo has logged off)_

_(ShinyPinkBubbles has logged off)_

. . . . . . . . .

Lol. Shoot I didn't think it was going to be this funny.

PwningU was Ikkatu, BTW. If you really pay attention this has lot of hints in it, Yoai or otherwise.

None of them were intentional.


	2. Explosions, Zanpakutos, and Girl Fights

**A/N: **Heres another one …

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . .. . . . .

EpicArcher: Hello…?

EpicArcher: Um … Hello?

EpicArcher: Hello? Anybody?

BiggerThanYouveSeen: Who are you?

Smiles: And how did you get into the Las Noches server?

MadMadMadSza: It shouldn't have been able to get on.

EternalTag: Nel telled everybody the password so we coulds all chat!

BigFace: Yes, isn't it fun, don'cha know!

SmallerFace: I agree!

EternalTag: See! Pesche and Dondochaka agree with Nel!

BiggerThanYouveSeen: If this girl used to be the number three, then I no longer feel all that important…

EpicArcher: Wait a minute … who are you people?

MadMadMadSza: OMG it still hasn't figured it out!

Smiles: Lolz.

(NotEmo has logged on)

NotEmo: Quincy, the woman says you're on the wrong server.

EpicArcher: I AM?

MadMadMadSza: OMG EpicArcher's the Quincy kid! HI!

Smiles: …

BigFace: We all gets along, don'cha know?

SmallerFace: . . .

EpicArcher: I'm leaving . . .

MadMadMadSza: NO! If you log off this server or walk away from your computer, you will EXPLODE!

EpicArcher: WHAT?

(ShinyPinkBubbles has logged on)

ShinyPinkBubbles: Ulqui-kun, is Ishida-kun on this server?

NotEmo: Yes.

Smiles: um… 'Ulqui-kun'? Lolz

EpicArcher: Inoue-san! Thank kami… I'm stuck and I can't log off this server or I'll blow up!

ShinyPinkBubbles: OMG wowz. I'll just go get everyone else and have them come here! Brb!

(FaceHighFive has logged on)

(3Chappy3 has logged on)

(ShinyPurpleBubbles has logged on)

(CANDY has logged on)

(DelicateSnowflakes has logged on)

(SittinUnderTheSakuraTree has logged on)

SittinUnderTheSakuraTree: howdo tyhow use this thaisdn?rrklejgm?

CANDY: LOLz Byakushi's Zanpakuto is havin troubles with the keyboard!

DelicateSnowflakes: Here, let me help, Senbonzakura.

3Chappy3: Um… I wonder why Senbonzakura and Sode no Shirayuki have been spending so much time together?

ShinyPurpleBubbles: Oh, you didn't know, Rukia? They're together.

3Chappy3: WHAT!

FaceHighFive: I can't believe you didn't know.

ShinyPinkBubbles: Aww, how sweet.

MadMadMadSza: I was unaware that Zanpakuto could-

Smiles: Stop that sentence, Octava.

EpicArcher: HELP! I CAN'T LOG OFF THIS SERVER!

MadMadMadSza: I will only turn off the device if you agree to come to Las Noches so I can *experiment* on you.

EpicArcher: . . .

Smiles: It's okay, Ishida, I'm sure Szayel Aporro will take good care of you.

MadMadMadSza: VERY good care of you.

(EpicArcher has logged off)

ShinyPinkbubbles: OMG ISHIDA HAS EXPOLDED! I HEARD IT!

MadMadMadSza: sigh. I guess I'll just have to get him and put him back together. It really was a win-win situation for me…

(MadMadMadSza has logged off)

CANDY: So… Orihime and Rukia, do you know where Ichigo is? Ken-chan wants to fight!

3Chappy3: NO.

ShinyPinkBubbles: NO.

CANDY: Oh. Well, I gots to go… there is a Shinigami Women's Association meeting today!

(CANDY has logged off)

BiggerThanYouveSeen: . . .

ShinyPurpleBubbles: Is your username some sort of challenge or something, because I beg to differ.

FaceHighFive: OMG GIRL FIGHT!

3Chappy3: ! ! ! ! !

BiggerThanYouveSeen: Are you trying to say that you are bigger than I am?

ShinyPurpleBubbles: Yes. Yes I am.

BiggerThanYouveSeen: You obsess over odd things.

(BiggerThanYouveSeen has logged off)

ShinyPurpleBubbles: But she's the one that put that has her username!

(ShinyPurpleBubbles has logged off)

FaceHighFive: Nel, why'd you tell us to log on to this server?

EternalTag: Because I don't know the password for the Shinigami's Server.

FaceHighFive: It's 'Zanpakuto'

EternalTag: Yay! Thank YOU!

(EternalTag has logged off)

(FaceHighFive has logged off)

Smiles: I'm bored.

(Smiles has logged off)

NotEmo: Girl.

3Chappy3: Yes?

NotEmo: Weren't there two others?

3Chappy3: Oh yeah. Senbonzakura and Sode no Shirayuki.

NotEmo: Yes, them. Where did they go?

3Chappy3: One second let me check . . .

3Chappy3: ZOMFGWTF!

NotEmo: What?

3Chappy3: They are . . . they are . . . uh . . . ACK!

NotEmo: . . .? Are you trying to say that your Zanpakuto and your brother's Zanpakuto are…?

3Chappy3: YES! SHEET! WHAT DOES THIS MEAN FOR NII-SAMA AND ME?

(3Chappy3 has logged off)

(NotEmo has logged off)

. . . . . . . . . . .. . . . . . . . ..

**A/N: **I love ByaRuki. Especially when it's also got Sode no Shirayuki x Senbonzakura.

Smiles was Gin… BiggerThanYouveSeen was Halibel… CANDY was Yachiru.


End file.
